“This decision is a slap in the face to all the hardworking bankers and economists out there.”

Bark Cuban

In a shocking turn of events, national banks across the country are in a state of absolute turmoil after it was announced that corgi butts are now the official currency of the United States. The decision, made by an anonymous committee, has left financial institutions scrambling to adapt to this unconventional economic system.

A New Era of Currency

These perky, fluffy dumpers have stolen the spotlight from traditional currency, leaving bank executives scratching their heads in disbelief.

But how did we get here? It all started when a video of a corgi’s adorable tush went viral on social media. The nation collectively fell in love with these stubby-legged, wagging behinds, and the rest is history.

Chaos at the Banks

The decision has caused mass hysteria at national banks, with economists and bankers alike protesting the move. “This decision is a slap in the face to all the hardworking bankers and economists out there,” said investment analyst Warren Buffet’s dog, Bark Cuban, during a protest outside the Federal Reserve.

As banks struggle to adapt, chaos reigns supreme. ATM machines have been reprogrammed to dispense corgi butts instead of cash, leaving customers baffled and dogs delighted. Bank tellers are also finding themselves in a sticky situation, as counting and sorting corgi butts proves to be more challenging than anticipated.

Impact on the Economy

The corgi butt currency has had a profound impact on the economy, with prices skyrocketing for items such as dog toys, treats, and, of course, corgi paraphernalia. The value of corgi breeding has also soared, with the Royal Family’s dog, Barkingham Palace, reportedly selling for a record-breaking sum of corgi butts.

• Hot dog vendors have capitalized on the trend, selling “Corgi Butts on a Bun” to eager customers.
• Several dog grooming salons have started offering corgi butt-themed haircuts, with pooches strutting down the streets sporting perfectly trimmed tushes.
• Celebrities have even jumped on the bandwagon, with Kim Kardashian’s dog, Barkley West, launching a line of corgi butt-shaped perfumes.

A Word from the Dogs

Amidst the chaos, the corgis themselves have remained relatively silent. When reached for comment, Sir Waggington III, a prominent corgi activist, stated, “We’re just happy to have our butts recognized for their true value. It’s about time.”

While the nation grapples with this new economic reality, one thing is for certain: corgi butts aren’t going anywhere. So, next time you find yourself in need of some cash, just remember to grab your leash and head to the nearest dog park. Who knows, you might just strike it rich with a handful of corgi butts!

And as they say, “In butts we trust!”