LAREDO, TX — A paw-printed contract was signed last week as Charlie, a Wirehaired Pointing Griffon, acquired the minor league baseball team, the Scrappy Chihuahuas. Despite a rocky start to the season, the new owner remains optimistic, as his primary focus is on playing fetch in the outfield.

A Woofing Success Story

In a statement released by Charlie’s publicist, the dog billionaire expressed his excitement about the acquisition, stating, “I’ve always been a huge fan of baseball, especially the part where they throw the ball and I get to run after it. So, when the opportunity arose to own my own team and play fetch all day, I knew I had to take it.”

Pitching a Ball, Not a Bone

While many are skeptical of Charlie’s ability to manage a baseball team, he insists that his skills will translate seamlessly from playing fetch in the backyard to leading a team on the field. “I’m an excellent ball retriever, so I don’t see any reason why I can’t be an excellent coach,” he said, wagging his tail in excitement.

New Rules of the Game

Charlie’s new role as team owner has already brought some changes to the Scrappy Chihuahuas’ operations. The team’s dugout has been replaced with a giant doghouse, and players are now required to bring their own toys to the field for Charlie to fetch during breaks.

Fetching the Fans

Despite the changes, some fans are excited to see what Charlie can bring to the table. “I’ve been a fan of the Scrappy Chihuahuas for years, but now that Charlie’s in charge, I can’t wait to see what kind of tricks he has up his paw,” said longtime fan and dog lover, Cameron Jones.

A Dog’s World

While some may view Charlie’s ownership of a baseball team as a silly or frivolous endeavor, it serves as a reminder that in this dog-eat-dog world, sometimes it’s the underdogs who come out on top.